Words & Music by Brooke Abbey, 2007.
It's not all bad being a redshirt, is it? Fame! Fortune! Phasers! Coldsleep pod malfunctions due to infection with a steganographic virus planted by malevolent AIs! Beats prostate cancer. Okay actually I'm trying to use reverse psychology on fate here, because now it would be totally ironic if I died in bed boringly at age 107, right? Right?
lyrics
War and starvation fill many a hearse Am Em
Heart disease takes two lives for every three Dm B E
If you die in a car crash, you won't be the first Am Em
But I'm hoping there's something less common for me Dm B E
I want to die like they do in sci-fi! A E A
A really glamourous death, a really famous last breath A E
I want to die like they do in sci-fi! A E A
I want to do something new, if it's the last thing I do F E A
I could be strangled by quantum entanglement Am F
Or maybe it turns out that comets cause cancer Dm B E
I'll be unspeakably mangled by Lovecraftian angles Am F
Or burn in the atmosphere like a star dancer Dm B E
I want to die...
I'll get lunar silicosis, 307 ale cirrhosis Am F
Or crustacean deprivation on the world without shrimp Dm B E
Maybe an alien probe will laser my frontal lobe Am F
and make me travel back in time to the Hindenberg blimp Dm B E
I want to die...
I'll be murdered inside a proton super-collider Am F
By an evil AI who didn't like my query Dm B E
I don't have to decide the best way to have died Am F
I'll do it infinite times thanks to many-worlds theory Dm B E
I want to die...
(guitar break)
I want to die...
AUGHHHHHHH!
credits
from Steel Cage Match,
released June 19, 2009
Vocals: Brooke Abbey, John Caspell
Banjola: Brooke Abbey
Guitar: John Caspell